More bullying vent art. I know I've done a lot of it already, but I like it.
I have decided that this coming school year, I will buy tons of post it notes and write nice things on them and stick them places in hope that it will make someone feel better. I will also hopefully telling random people I think they are pretty, because I wish someone would say that to me. I will also be start telling all of my classmates during that "YEAH, 1st DAY OF SCHOOL WHO ARE YOU?" time to not be scared of me. I think I freak people out. I never speak in class and I always sit alone and I always look angry. And I don't mean to, it's just how I be! SO I will tell the peeps "K, don't be afraid of me. Despite my looks, I will not bite your face off, unless you're being obnoxious. Then maybe I will. Please talk to me. I am not scary, I promise." I will also ask my counselor if our school has some sort of anti-bullying sort of dealy because I would love to be a part of it. And if we don't, I'll ask about maybe setting one up. Because victims of bullying need to know that someone really cares and there is someone to talk to!! Because I care. And I'll listen. I want to be the person who will speak out against bullies, because no one did for me. and I wish someone did.
I have also started cutting again... It took my mom a few days to see the cut on my arm. I almost wanted my parents to see them so I know they care. But I already know they care. When she saw it and I told her the real reason for it she looked so sad and worried. I feel like I let everyone down. I said I would never cut again, but I did. And now I wish I tried harder to keep it secret. I feel so horrible. These scars will be with me for the rest of my life. I will try my hardest to keep this away from my dad. Last time he found out I was self harming, he got really REALLY angry and scary. And I don't want that again. I will start worrying about this whole self harming thing when I start to think about doing it daily. Which hasn't happened yet